I Went in the Rabbit Hole and Came Out the Other Side

Blitzed on a Saturday night and left cock in hand. No better time to talk about it than now. How did the forum save my life? How did the game save my life? I’m back thinking about it again after I feel alone like I always do on these nights.

I think LINUX stated in a thread somewhere that the magic of game is that you can go anywhere and never feel alone. Yeah I’m pretty damned alone. I’m a lonely fuck and even my kid brother can’t cheer me up out of this crap half the time. That’s why this stuff saved me.

It’s like a magic pill being able to pull a woman with the right amount of hard work and a bit of flair. How having someone prove me completely wrong on the Internet was the kind of ass kicking I needed after life beat me down literally and figuratively to get my shit together. Many moons ago I did drugs. No I still do but not as much. I never went into cocaine or meth territory, but the molly and hallucinogens flowed freely. Made the mind a mush and my daily interactions hell.

I thought they were all idiots. I thought all the bitches who left me were whores. And when I turned to one of the people I considered my friends at the time he hung up on me after calling me a liar jackass and a piece of shit. Yea it sucked. It took a long call with the man I consider the brother I chose to keep the knife edge away from my artery and even then the thoughts came back.

Well I found that cure. I could finally keep a girl around for a bit longer that wanted me around. I found more friends than the few that I truly had that legitimately kept me happy especially when I started meeting some of them off of an online forum. Then I started finding them in my day to day.

Yea it fucking excites me that I get texts out of nowhere to hang out rather than it being business or to help some guy who considers me his “friend”. Especially when those “friends” don’t so much as ask if I’m alright. Just business with another twist.

So thank you for being here. You know who you people are.

All the best,

Comte De St. Germain

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